few years ago, a fake news story once declared that the Filipino is the most gullible race in the world, and a real Filipino journalist then unironically used this story to complain about how gullible Filipinos are. Silly, right?
The good news is, we’re not alone in this world. Quite a few of these stories have fooled people from other countries, too. The bad news is, that doesn’t make any of us any less gullible if we fell for at least half of the following fake stories.
The story: An amazing team of stunt performers do some death-defying tricks involving ping pong paddles and knives. It went viral on the internet, so it must be true, right?
The harsh reality: Well, for once, the degenerate YouTube commenters who cried the video was “fake and gay” got it half right. This video was a product of clever editing and amazing timing, but nope, that’s all
If it were real: They would now be a part of the Cirque De Soleil. Or endorsing Hawaiian pizzas for Pizza Hut.
The story: Read on-air on WAVE 891 by my friend Chiqui just last Monday, this hilarious story shows that what goes around comes around. Because Eminem was so misogynistic and downright mean-spirited in his rap music, he now fears letting his daughter, Hailey, date anyone who happens to be a fan of his music. My, my, my. How the mighty have fallen.
The harsh reality: I quickly checked Chiqui’s source after we finished discussing the story, and as I suspected, yep, it was by The Onion. Now, if you haven’t realized this yet, The Onion is a satirical news site, and it tends to come out with the most hilariously unbelievably fake news stories. Yet people fall for them. All. The. Freaking. Time.
If it were real: You know what? I just might not be shocked if a similar news story does end up coming out in the future. Eminem is a pretty self-aware guy, and he might not want his daughter dating someone too much like himself.
The story: Apparently, not all boyfriends are well-trained. A Chinese man reportedly jumped to his death inside a mall after his girlfriend insisted on going to one clothes shop too many. Crass commercialization! Poor boyfriends! This is what gay best friends are for! Down with this sort of thing!
The harsh reality: It’s the Daily Mail, guys. If it’s not cancer, it’s probably a pack of lies. Or at least, a complete fabrication of a non-existent backstory, because while there was indeed a death in a Chinese mall some time ago, there was no reason actually supplied.
If it were real: There are so many people in the malls during the holidays that jumping off the top floor would probably just land you in the middle of the shopping bags of a visibly annoyed shopper. Or a checkout guy might accidentally catch you while he holds out his double thumbs-up after chanting, “At your service, yes!”
The story: This was a tale many weaboos wished were true. The story was, “Japan relaxes visa rules for Pinoy starting July 1.” It sounded too good to be true! No more visas, you say?
The harsh reality: Uhhh… who said anything about there being no more visas? Relaxing visa rules does not mean eliminating them altogether, which most news outfits were quick to point out a few days after.
If it were real: Expect even more visiting Pinoy fans/stalkers for Japanese idols, whether of the J-Pop or cosplay variety, because that was the original plan when this news story broke.
The story: A hilarious video of a woman who was twerking and ended up setting herself on fire. “Epic fail” doesn’t even begin to cover the hilarity of the video, and you had people saying this was all Miley’s fault,
The harsh reality: Jimmy Kimmel fooled us all. Brilliantly. He actually manufactured this video, somehow managed to make it go viral, have it picked up by all sorts of mainstream media outfits, then like a thief in the night, he let the genie out of the bottle, and everyone felt stupid for being had. Or not, because we still fell for a bunch of fake stories in the following three months.
If it were real: Those yoga pants would probably be on auction in eBay about two weeks ago.
The story: Plastic surgery gone wrong! A man marries a hot woman, and ends up having ugly children with her. He asks for a divorce when he finds out that he was deceived. But hey, it could have been worse, right? He could have been married to this lady instead.
The harsh reality: Not only is this story patently fake, it has been running around for years already. Thing is, the picture you see? That’s actually an ad for plastic surgery in Taiwan. It was a fake story in 2012, it’s definitely still a fake story today.
If it were real: I would still like to ask the woman out. Some people diet and hit the gym. Others visit the doctor. I fail to see a significant difference.
The story: You just have to hand it to whoever made this one up. It was really a brand-spanking new story that just totally choked the life out of the competition, and really burst into the public consciousness. No, I don’t need to explain the story, I think the headline says it all.
The harsh reality: It was a load of bull. I don’t want to bash whoever swallowed this tripe, but come on! The source, G17, is a fake news site, and they’re really mostly just a bunch of wankers. Okay, enough. I don’t think I have 33 more euphemisms to spare to match the kid’s non-existent record.
If it were real: Who the hell kept count?!?
The story: One of our favorite local fake-news sites, So What’s News, came out with this doozy of an article, detailing the sordid tale of how Senator Jinggoy Estrada supposedly smuggled money into the States by inserting the currency surgically into his breasts.
The harsh reality: I think it should be obvious that the story is fake, but mainstream media clearly didn’t think so, as they actually went and asked the good senator about it when he got back. The senator was wildly offended and denied the story, and only on hindsight did the press even realize that the satirical article was so fake, you guys!
If it were real: It would make sense why Janet Napoles calls Senator Estrada “sexy.”
What do you think of these stories? Were you fooled when you first saw them? Were you able to fool other people when you shared these stories on your social networking accounts? The Comments Section below is waiting for you!