h the World Cup. We don’t hate it: we just don’t feel one way or the other about it. Most of our friends, this guy included, have these thought bubbles going on in our heads when the topic turns to the World Cup…

8. Why are people so touchy when I call it soccer? I just don’t want any confusion!

It’s football. The game is football. If someone should have actually gone and changed their name, it’s the game that involves carrying a ball with your hands from one end to another.

7. How is a game where a 4-3 final score is considered a “high-scoring game” remotely exciting?

Being a basketball-crazy country, it boggles a non-football fan’s mind how scores that hardly ever reaches the double digits could be deemed as action-packed in the mind of a football fan.


6. Is this like Ms. Universe for dudes?

Remember how gay people root for certain beauty queens from other countries sometimes? Well, that’s how non-World Cup followers feel about guys who rally behind (Ms) Germany or (Ms) Netherlands.


5. Why are there even draws?

In basketball, you can hypothetically play as many overtime periods as it takes to determine a winner, but this is not the case in football.


4. What’s the big deal?

It’s a football game. If you’re a non-sports fan, then you would never understand why people get together and enjoy watching football—at four in the morning, for that matter.


3. Why aren’t the goalies more famous?

While there are some standout goalies, you’d be hard-pressed to find any of them named when a fan rattles off their 8 favorite football players.


2. What’s with all those stories about riots and violence breaking out?

Stemming back to non-fans wondering what the big deal about the game is, this is a question people can’t help but ask when they’re on the outside looking in and have only been recently acquainted with the term “football hooligans.”


1. Where are the Azkals?

Because unfortunately, the extent of football knowledge a vast majority of us Pinoys have begins and ends with the Younghusbands.


Kel Fabie

Kel Fabie. is a DJ, host, mentalist, satirist, comedian, and a long-time contributor to 8List (Hello, ladies!). He has an Oscar, a Pulitzer, a Nobel, and two other weirdly-named pet dogs. He blogs on mistervader.com.

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